The Edinburgh Festival 2011. Explanations and recommendations

June 22nd, 2011

A guide by Susan Calman

Hello! Nice to meet you. Well, not meet you. I may not know who you are. But let’s face it in cyberspace it’s as close to marriage as damn it to read someone’s blog.

Anyway, this piece of hastily written prose is all about the Edinburgh Festival and contains handy hints and suggestions to make your enjoyment of the edinburgh festival increase tenfold! Please be aware though that if your enjoyment doesn’t increase tenfold it’s not my fault. It’s yours. You probably didn’t drink enough.

What are my qualifications for such a bold statement you ask? Well

I am a comedian
I have completed 5 years, 4 solo shows, 2 sketch shows, one chat show, several radio shows and around 400 gigs during my time at the festival.
I have spent around £50,000 “having fun” at the festival.
I’m not doing a solo show this year so have no vested interest with any one venue.

It’s like surviving Nam.

First off lets talk about the Festival in general. What are the most common questions I am asked when people find out I perform. Please note all the opinions expressed here are my own and are very general.

Isn’t it just a piece of corporate crap now with no real artistic joy?

Well yes. In a way. But it is still the best place to see as much comedy as possible in a very small space. The pressure on acts is immense but the potential of seeing a complete mental breakdown on stage can add to the fun. It is still where comics good and bad, new and old go to try stuff out. It won’t be corporate if audiences still seek out gems wherever they may be.

Are shows in the big venues better than in the smaller ones?

Yes and no. Let me explain. In order to get a show into one of the “big four” (that being the Pleasance, Underbelly, Assembly and Gilded Balloon) you need to a)guarantee or pay some cash b) have some sort of relationship with the venue, or have a promoter or agent with a relationship with the venue. That means that it is unlikely that a completely new act with no exposure in the media will be there. That doesn’t mean that the quality of the show will be any better but it does mean that there is more pressure to sell tickets so it is likely that the act in question will have previewed etc. That isn’t always the case however and Free Fringe can be just as funny if not more so. In essence a ticket to a big four show doesn’t mean it will be great, and a free show won’t necessarily be rubbish. If you see a show at a big venue see one at a free fringe/festival one as well.

Whats the difference between the Free fringe and Free festival?

I don’t know. I don’t care. Just go and support the shows.

Why should I bother to leave Bristo square?

Because if you don’t you will miss the amazing show at venues like the Stand. I know it’s easy to be lazy but at least once in your visit go to the other side of town and check out something different.

Should I pay attention to the Guardian/Metro/Telegraph best shows of the festival lists?

Yes and no. The shows that get on those lists are usually the ones which there are some “buzz” about. Sometimes that buzz is genuine sometimes manufactured. It’s a good guide but shouldn’t be your be all and end all.

What about reviews? Shouldn’t I just go and see the shows that get 4 and 5 star reviews?

No! Reviewers are apparently human (although some are definitely not). They have bad days, good days and sometimes just don’t get something. I’ve seen 5 star shows that I though were shit and 1 star shows that changed my life. Sure look at them but don’t life your life by them. Reviews are often incorrect.

What should I do if I like a show?

Tell people! Word of mouth is still the most effective marketing tool available. If you like a show recommend it to others.

But if a show is rubbish it’s because the comedian is shit isn’t it?

No! Audiences at the festival have the ability to kill even the most wonderful show stone dead. If you attend a show and do the following things the show will automatically become better.

Laugh. This sounds simple but believe me some audiences forget to do it. If a show is going badly laugh anyway, it might catch on.
Don’t sit in the front row with your arms folded. Especially don’t do it if you don’t want the comic to talk to you. They will.
Don’t turn up steaming. The comic will probably hit you for destroying 12 months worth of work. Quite right too.
Don’t comment on the show right after. The performer is probably hiding under the stage waiting for the audience to leave, will hear you and may kill themselves.
Don’t for the love of god walk out. It’s only 55 minutes stay where you are.
Don’t play angry birds. It’s rude.

People who flyer are scum aren’t they?

No! Be nice to them! They are just trying to get punters in. Accept a flyer, smile and then put it in a recycling bin. You can’t understand how awful it is standing on the Royal Mile for 10 hours a day only to have someone spit at you.

What about contemporary dance? Can you recommend something?

No. Comedy is my game.

CALMAN RECOMMENDATIONS FOR 2011

And so to my recommendations. The following are the acts that I quite fancy this year. It’s not a definitive list and I’ll add to it as time goes on so check back if you want. I have put the page reference of the main brochure beside the show so you can see for yourself. They are in no particular order and it is by no means the only acts to see but are ones I will for sure be going to see. You will notice as many, if not more, women than men. Nothing political in that it just so happens that they are funny people.

Francesca Martinez. The Stand. Page 77

Al Murray. Compete for the Meat. Page 37

Andi Osho. Page 38.

Arthur Smiths Pissed Chat Show. Page 40.

Barry And Stuart. Page 43.

Margaret Cho. Page 113

Boy with Tape on his Face. Page 51.

Bridget Christie. Page 53.

Fred Macaulay. Page 78

Hannah Gadsby. Page 86.

Holly Walsh. Page 88.

Issy Suttie. Page 93.

Jen Brister. Page 97.

Joanna Neary. Page 99.

Juliet Myers. Page 103

LadyGarden. Page 106.

Ruby Wax. Page 145.

Mary Bourke. Page 115.

Meryl O’Rourke. Page 118.

Caroline Mabey. Page 54.

Sarah Millican. Page 147.

Sara Pascoe. Page 147.

Tom Allen. Page 160.

Wendy Wason. Page 164.

Zoe Lyons. Page 167.